My heart named Tyler

One more week under my belt, and again, another lifetime led for a hot minute.

Where have the days gone where I could count on tomorrow?

I'm scared of what tomorrow brings now. Scared that it's to bring more disappointment, more let-down, more emptiness.

The hardest part is realizing that my feelings are borne of my hidden hopes and my sanguine expectations... this is all my doing.

And it's all I try to avoid.

But my heart won't stop making an effort to love, no matter how much I try to stand in its way.

I feel like I'm Edward Norton in Fight Club, and my heart is Tyler Durden. Oh how it sometimes fills me with confidence and make me feel invincible, but when it's not, my heart is my worst adversary.

I'm not about to shoot myself to make my heart named Tyler go away though.

I guess I'll just have to keep letting the weeks come and go, and hope that someday, well, hope that someday my crazy heart will calm down and just be content with me...